5 things you can do now you’re out of Uni!

Figuring out what to do with yourself when you’re finally done and dusted with university can be a difficult proposition. While it’s easy to coast by obeying your Student Union President’s every word, surviving in the real world is far trickier. So if you’re sitting around with no job lined up, no projects or plans to work on; don’t worry, we’ve got you covered! So, without further ado, here are our five ideas for things you should try now you’re no longer at Uni:

1. Pretend nothing has changed!

Why should life be different now that you don’t have to go to class or keep up with your College Team worship any more? You can keep living in your student digs, you can still hang with your mates from Uni (who haven’t left), you can still drink yourself into oblivion! If you walk like a student, talk like a student and regularly ruin the lives of yourself and everyone around you then you’re basically still a student! Yay!

2. Lash out!

So your best friend moved back to London, the lease on your digs is running short and you might have to move back in with your parents. You could try mindfulness, a new hobby, seek therapy or think about employment and social security as you consider what you want from the future. That said, the easiest and most productive option available to you right now is probably just knocking someone’s block off, smashing some windows, reigniting some old drama or screaming at a helpless service worker. Go for it! It’s hard for you right now, everyone will understand.

3. Go back to Uni!

You know what they say; if you can’t beat ’em, go back to Uni! Going back to university gives you vital breathing room so you can put off thinking about anything important or making any difficult life decisions. Hurray! You could dig deeper into the subject you’ve been studying for the past three or more years with a master’s degree or a doctorate, or you could just ditch that colossal snoozefest and try something new entirely, squandering tens of thousands of pounds and years of your life. Oh well, so long as you never get a job you’ll never have to pay it off.

4. Give up!

So looking for more courses to take was a bust, your eviction date is looming and you’re the only person you know still hanging around your place. In a few days you’ll be back at mum and dad’s. This is it. You’ll never have your own place. You’ll never get to live out your dreams. You’ll never find a partner. This is the end. At this point no one would blame you if you sat naked in a cupboard for the rest of your wretched, pointless life. It’s worth a try at least!

5. Look for a job…

JUST KIDDING! I was told I should put at least one joke in the article, but don’t worry, I’ve included one extra idea to make up for it…

5(+1). Just do nothing!

Hey! It turns out that being a directionless loser with no life prospects isn’t that bad! It’s like being a child forever. With your pocket money, your mates from your school days and the family dog/cat/monitor/hamster/fish you can just sit around doing not much of anything and everything is fine!

Your whole life you’ve been warned that some time when you become an adult the Gnarled Inspector would wake you up in the dead of night and accost you on your life choices, but it turns out he’s not that bad and just wants to make sure you’re doing okay. He’s actually pretty helpful; talk about an undeserved reputation! Why did you even bother going to university in the first place? Who knows, but at least you’ve got enough memories of throwing up in a run down toilet to last you a lifetime!